I was catching up with a young friend recently when she mentioned she'd been dating a guy for several months. I hadn't heard about a boyfriend in her life so I asked, "Does he treat you good?" She hesitated a second and said, "Well..." I interrupted her right away and said, "Darlin' the answer to that question is 'yes.'" Then I asked my typical second question: "Does he love Jesus?" She hesitated again, "Well ..."
"Ok, look," I said, "The answer to both of those questions is always yes. There is no 'Well...' You hold yourself to a high standard so that he reaches to achieve it. You are worth it."
Moments later I ran into another young friend and asked if her boyfriend was treating her well. She answered yes immediately. When I asked if he loved Jesus, I got a second immediate yes. I was reassured and happy for her.
But sadly, the number of young ladies who don't answer those two questions with an immediate yes far outweigh those who answer in the affirmative. I ask those questions of all the young adults in my life. After teaching youth Sunday School for years, I know many precious young souls. When I hear they've begun dating someone, those are my go-to questions every time ... "Does he treat you good?" and "Does he love Jesus." And you would not believe the number of young ladies who cannot respond favorably to either. What has happened to the young women of this world where they are willing to settle for someone who does not treat them as the Princess of God they are? Or look the other way when it comes to faith in Christ? If a man is not following the Word of God, it's no telling what his moral guide is, what he emulates in his character, and where his priorities are. Are young ladies so desperate to date that they are willing to compromise their values and expectations? Good heavens, it's not worth it. Men are not a project. They are called by God to be the spiritual head of the household. So they should be held to that standard. And if they aren't there yet, then walk away. If every young lady expected every young man to treat them well and love our Lord Jesus Christ, men would strive to do both of those things. Trust me, with men thinking about sex every six seconds of the day, it's easy to blur the line between lust and true love. So keep that first bit out of the equation while dating, so there is clarity of character.
I read a quote by C.S. Lewis that said,
Yes, yes, yes! It's no wonder our country's females are dealing with case after case of sexual harassment and inappropriate behavior. No man should ever, ever feel he has the right to treat a woman any less than God's beautiful, precious, beloved daughter. We've heard the many women who are speaking out, some after many years of silence, but good heavens, why did it ever happen in the first place? I've seen so many #metoo hashtags (where women affirm they have been sexually harassed) that it's embarrassing for both men and women. I was harassed once. I'm a #metoo. It was a man who felt he could reach out and grab my bottom. I turned around, grabbed him by his shirt, slammed him to the wall, and getting inches from his face said, "Don't you EVER touch me again." The fellow was stunned and slunked away. How dare any man feel he had that right? Who knows how many he'd touched that way before who just let it happen.
Look, girls, your worth is in Jesus Christ. You are His cherished baby girls. You are valuable, priceless and so unbelievably loved by your Father. Never, ever let a man treat you disrespectfully, no matter who they are. And never settle for anything less than a man who puts God first in his life and knows that worth.
The answers to both those questions above are yes and yes. Don't settle for less.
There was something about that statement that made me stop, rewind and listen again. This is not new information for me by any means, but the phrasing was sweetly simplistic and accurate. The idea of God in heaven being worshiped by countless sacrifices over thousands of years - which never fully atoned for His creation's disobedience - then coming to the conclusion that He must sacrifice Himself on our behalves is overwhelming. An all encompassing sacrifice so that we would never again need to atone: Christ has done it all. Of course, such a revelation would be profound for Lewis. As a result of this realization (and his acceptance of Christ into his life nine days later), we are the grateful recipients of some of the best books of the last century and some profound theology. Praise God for the persistence of Lewis' friends and God's unwavering patience for his lost children.
