Forest For The Trees

Have you heard that quirky little statement, "I can't see the forest for the trees?" It means that you are so embroiled in a situation you can't see it for what it really is. You know, as in, "Wow, there are so many trees!" "Well, hey, you're in a forest, so..."

Since the beginning of this year, I have felt that way. It seems as if there are so many trees, that I can't see the forest for it. We have had a number of trying situations of late: family health issues, broken hearts, death and job challenges among others all piled one on top of another. It got so bad that one day I started to forget which situation I was crying about. And I shed a lot of tears. I felt like there were so very many hardships filling up our life at every turn that I was being defeated. It got to the point where I couldn't even pray clearly. I was having trouble forming words to pray to our Father. I would simply say, "Father, you know what is going on. Help. Amen." And those were the good prayers. Tree after tree after tree. I became convinced every phone call would bring more bad news. It was a sad, defeatist mentality, but it was ever present. I was like one of those moles people whack at an arcade. When would the beating stop. At one point my husband even said, "Is this worth it?"

I caught my breath when he said that. The Lord did a little Holy Spirit reminding for me in the moment. I said to my husband, "When Christ hung on the cross, he looked at the faces below him and asked, 'Is this worth it?' And decided we were. What we are going through is nothing like that."

Thankfully during this time period (which is still going on), our family in Christ has picked up the slack. In the moments where we couldn't pray, they did. In the moments of true despair, we were being uplifted by hundreds of people to our Father. People reached out to us in ways that were so perfectly and divinely timed that we felt God's embrace. Because of that, we were able to face each moment, each day. Matter of fact, in the deepest, darkest times, there was peace, strength, encouragement and sweet moments of grace that blew us away. 

How do people without a church family do it? How to they face death without their brothers and sisters reminding them of heaven? How do they face major health issues without their church family offering words of comfort and prayers of healing? How do people without Jesus face challenges in the workplace or struggles with people around them without the saints reminding us to love the sinner and hate the sin? How grateful I am that we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses in the faith to hold us up when we are broken. Oh, that I may be the one holding up another in similar circumstances.

Recently while hiking one of our favorite trails, I was reminded of the thickness of the forest around me. Even in the winter season, it was difficult to see past the trees. But last week when hiking through that same path, we saw wildflower after wildflower peeking between the increasingly greening trees: God's sweet reminder of hope, joy, and calm in the midst of it all.

We will have more trying times like these, maybe even worse. And I can't say while in the middle of it that I'm better for it. Not yet. But I know my Father has me. I know we are being lifted in fervent prayer by people who have loved us, cried with us, comforted us and spoke or wrote words of encouragement to us. And that one day - maybe not on this side of heaven - we will see the forest in all its glory and understand what this season was all about.

Till then, we hike on, taking one day at a time, finding joy in so many precious moments, relying on the sojourners with us and praising our Father God for holding us so closely in the midst of it. After all, He who created the forest is the One who will help us find the path through it.

 

All the trees of the field shall know that I am the LORD. I bring low the high tree, and I make high the low tree: I dry up the green tree and make the dry tree flourish. I the LORD have spoken; I will accomplish it." Ezek. 17:24

Waves of Life

My husband was holding me from behind with his arms around me as we stood in the Gulf of Mexico waste deep near the pier in Ft. Walton Beach, Florida. He rested his chin on my head and we stood staring south out over the beautiful clear blue-green water. My husband delighted in the calmness of the sea, with the small rolling waves breaking behind us closer to shore. I spent much of my time looking for the sharks I'd heard about that I thought would love swimming near the pier where fisherman cast bait over the railing.

Since the gulf was so calm, the sea was nearly flat with tiny ripples, but every once and awhile a wave would nudge us both enough to throw us off balance just a bit. We'd giggle every time it happened. Finally my husband profoundly said, "You know this is just like life. You think you have your feet firmly planted and something comes along to try to knock you over."

As we were celebrating our 23rd wedding anniversary there in the panhandle of Florida and reminscing over our years together, I thought about his analogy. Many times over those years we thought everything was stable, blessing after blessing, when all of a sudden something would happen to knock us off our feet. Sometimes the challenges were small and other times they were huge, difficult challenges that took much more time to recover from. Many times, it wasn't a recovery that occured, but rather a sharpening of sorts, winnowing perhaps or even a readjustment. No matter how firmly we thought out feet were planted in the sand, that has never stopped the waves. Brad was right. This was like life.

The morning of our anniversary as we looked at pictures from our wedding I asked my husband, "If you could go back in time to your newlywed self, what would you tell him?" He said quickly, "I would tell him to get his spiritual act together." I then asked, "Would you have listened to yourself?" Without hestitating he responded, "No, probably not." When asked the same question about what I would've said to that young bride in white silk organza, I replied, "Armor up, girl. There are challenges ahead."

When I think about the two of us standing in the cool waters of the gulf, I remember what each of us was doing at that moment, and how it reflects our outlook in life of late. My husband delights in the calm moments. You can hear him sigh, breathing in God's goodness. While I'm busy looking for sharks in the water, watching for the next challenge to head out way. It's just what our life experiences and spiritual journeys have brought us to thus far.

And no matter what waves are coming, it looks like between the two of us, with God as our anchor ... we've got a nice balance.