Yes and Yes

I was catching up with a young friend recently when she mentioned she'd been dating a guy for several months. I hadn't heard about a boyfriend in her life so I asked, "Does he treat you good?" She hesitated a second and said, "Well..." I interrupted her right away and said, "Darlin' the answer to that question is 'yes.'" Then I asked my typical second question: "Does he love Jesus?" She hesitated again, "Well ..."

"Ok, look," I said, "The answer to both of those questions is always yes. There is no 'Well...' You  hold yourself to a high standard so that he reaches to achieve it. You are worth it."

Moments later I ran into another young friend and asked if her boyfriend was treating her well. She answered yes immediately. When I asked if he loved Jesus, I got a second immediate yes. I was reassured and happy for her.

But sadly, the number of young ladies who don't answer those two questions with an immediate yes far outweigh those who answer in the affirmative. I ask those questions of all the young adults in my life. After teaching youth Sunday School for years, I know many precious young souls. When I hear they've begun dating someone, those are my go-to questions every time ... "Does he treat you good?" and "Does he love Jesus." And you would not believe the number of young ladies who cannot respond favorably to either. What has happened to the young women of this world where they are willing to settle for someone who does not treat them as the Princess of God they are? Or look the other way when it comes to faith in Christ? If a man is not following the Word of God, it's no telling what his moral guide is, what he emulates in his character, and where his priorities are. Are young ladies so desperate to date that they are willing to compromise their values and expectations? Good heavens, it's not worth it. Men are not a project. They are called by God to be the spiritual head of the household. So they should be held to that standard. And if they aren't there yet, then walk away. If every young lady expected every young man to treat them well and love our Lord Jesus Christ, men would strive to do both of those things. Trust me, with men thinking about sex every six seconds of the day, it's easy to blur the line between lust and true love. So keep that first bit out of the equation while dating, so there is clarity of character.

I read a quote by C.S. Lewis that said,

Yes, yes, yes! It's no wonder our country's females are dealing with case after case of sexual harassment and inappropriate behavior. No man should ever, ever feel he has the right to treat a woman any less than God's beautiful, precious, beloved daughter. We've heard the many women who are speaking out, some after many years of silence, but good heavens, why did it ever happen in the first place? I've seen so many #metoo hashtags (where women affirm they have been sexually harassed) that it's embarrassing for both men and women. I was harassed once. I'm a #metoo. It was a man who felt he could reach out and grab my bottom. I turned around, grabbed him by his shirt, slammed him to the wall, and getting inches from his face said, "Don't you EVER touch me again." The fellow was stunned and slunked away. How dare any man feel he had that right? Who knows how many he'd touched that way before who just let it happen.

Look, girls, your worth is in Jesus Christ. You are His cherished baby girls. You are valuable, priceless and so unbelievably loved by your Father. Never, ever let a man treat you disrespectfully, no matter who they are. And never settle for anything less than a man who puts God first in his life and knows that worth.

The answers to both those questions above are yes and yes. Don't settle for less.

Be Still

I've seen it over and over and over again this week. "Be still and know that I am God." It comes from Psalm 46:10. I have heard it in various devotions, Christian songs, even a Facebook memory where a friend shared a Jesus Calling devotion with me years ago on that very subject. It got to a point where I said out loud, "OK, Lord, I get it. I get it. I'm not spending enough alone time with you."

Anyone who knows me knows "being still" is not my gift. I like to keep busy. That's not to say I'm always running around, but I'm not one to sit still and do nothing. I'm pretty much always doing something, even in those sitting-still moments. So even during my devotion times with God in the mornings (after reading Scripture or while walking), I'm doing a whole lot of talking to him. To "be still and know" requires blocking out external influences and really listening for God. I suppose that's why I'm drawn to the beach so often ... you do a lot of sitting and "being still" there in awe of Him.

But recently, I found myself going full force first thing in the morning, forgetting to just be still and know Him. I'd walk into my office and see my Bible and journal sitting there on the pink bed and do an "oh yeah, I haven't done that yet. I'll get to it" wave of the hand before going about doing want I thought I needed to do first. I was pushing what should have been my first priority of the day to the side. And you know, when I do that, it seems as if my day gets out of whack pretty quickly. When the Lord keeps putting "be still and know" in front of you countless times in one week, you figure He must have something very important He needs to share with you, convict you of, teach you and/or nudge you to do. Or maybe, just maybe, He just wants to spend time with me.

My daughter calls me every single morning, except Sundays when she's worshiping. On her 25-30 minute drive to work, she calls. We chat about the previous day or the day ahead. We talk about things we're struggling with, joys we're experiencing, adventures we hope to have and funny stories along the way. I look so forward to speaking with her each day, that oftentimes I'll drag myself out of bed after a late night just to be sure I'm up to receive her call. And if I miss it, I feel like I've missed out on a truly precious moment to start off my day.

Now look at it from God's perspective. Look at the above paragraph as if God wrote it. If I love it when my daughter takes the time to call each day, how much more the Father must love it when we take time to "call." God was missing my calls. If Ayla let five days go by without calling, I would miss her so very much ... and frankly worry that something was wrong. Knowing this, I don't want God to miss me. I need Him in my life every single moment. And honestly, when I'm not going to Him, something is wrong.

The moment I sat down to have my quiet time with God this morning reading through my chronological Bible, I thought, "I've got to write about how important this is." So I read my Bible, wrote a prayer in my journal and immediately sat down to write this. So while I read and prayed, I really have not listened as much as I should have just yet. I do believe the Father inspired me to write this for His glory ... but now it's time to be still and do some listening.

Sin Burrs

Cenchrus spinifex. That's it's official name. We call them sand burrs. And they are beasts. Commonly found by the beach, this grassy plant has tiny burrs with 1/4 inch spikes on them that catch onto anything that passes by: shoe laces, pant hems, beach bags. Trying to pull them out without tweezers is risky as the spikes can go into your fingers. They feel like needles going deep into your skin.

On a recent weekend to the Gulf, the trek to the shore from our beach house was through an empty lot that had several of these sand burr plants. We didn't know it at the time, however, and came back with spiky burrs attached to the bottoms of our flip flops. Unbeknownst to us, these burrs were then transferred to the carpets in the bedrooms. On that first afternoon, you heard a number of "Ouch!" "What is that?" "Did I step on glass?" comments coming from the various rooms as people stepped on the nasty spikes. We quickly discovered the burrs and how they were getting in the house. From that moment on, we watched carefully where we walked and checked our flip flops for burrs before entering the house ... most of the time.

It reminded me of the way Satan sneakily creeps into our lives: latching on when we don't pay attention, finding different ways to eerily infiltrate our families and causing so much pain that could have been prevented had we been watching for Him. I watched as Satan did just that between friends who loved each other so much they thought they were impervious to that kind of trickery. But alas, no one is truly safe from the evil one. We know as Christians we are to armor up against such attacks (Eph. 6:10-17), but without a reminder once and awhile, we may forget to put on that protection and watch for the one who seeks to devour us (1 Peter 5:8). Precautions will be taken in future situations so that Satan will not have that kind of access, and hopefully repercussions will be minor as folks recognize the culprit. However, we allowed it to occur in the first place.

Praying we carefully examine our surroundings, ask for God's blessings and protection in our homes and relationships and forthrightly remove ourselves from circumstances that appear askew. May we always remember to Whom we belong and that our actions reflect it ... before getting stuck by the burrs of sin Satan hopes become commonplace in destruction of our love for one another and destruction of our obedience to the One who loves us most.