Providence? Or curse?

Our winter has been heavenly warm of late. So much so, that I have daffodils and azaleas in bloom. In December and January that just doesn't happen in Alabama. I prefer this warmer weather. I get cold quite easily, so as soon as the temperature drops below 60 degrees, I'm chilled. (And no, living in Wisconsin for part of your life does NOT thicken your skin to the point that once you've lived in the South you can handle it.) The other morning while walking across the tile floor in my bathroom, I shot up an arrow prayer to the Father thanking Him for this warm winter. And I felt in my heart Him commenting, "You're welcome. But you understand that means less flowers in Spring?" I stopped right there. Say what?! He made it quite clear that our Spring flowers were dependent on a dormant cold winter. I had to think about that one. While I didn't not like being cold, I love a Spring filled with colorful blooms. Was I willing to have the colder winter for that? Absolutely. I'll take the cold.

It got me to thinking about the trials we face in this lifetime. If we knew that after we went through a challenge in our life, that something beautiful would come of it, would we handle those situations differently? Our Father has this perfect plan for us, to grow us and make us more like Christ, that oftentimes requires some events that, well, I'd just as soon do without. But, like the cold temperatures of winter, if it means greater glory for Him at the end of it ... I think I can handle it.

My Ayla has gone through countless trials since her move to Rhode Island, calling this time in her life "The Providence Curse." She said things have gotten so bad at times that she'd go to pray or read her Bible and actually think to herself, "What's the use?" My heart broke when she said it, to know that she was that low of spirit and that Satan had convinced her that prayer and keeping a daily connection with God would not bring her any peace. Ayla has pulled herself out of that funk, choosing to focus on God, get back into study and a daily devotion time and seeking Christian support and a church in her area. I've commented to her often what a wonderful plan God must have for her after this time of trial.

Now I'm not saying we should delight in the trials. We just need to remember that we've got a Father who loves us so much and can see what's ahead. There's a wonderful new song called "Already There" by Casting Crowns off their Come To The Well CD that perfectly captures this spirit.

From where I'm standing
Lord it's so hard for me to see
Where this is going
And where You're leading me
I wish I knew how
All my fears and all my questions
Are gonna play out
In a world I can't control

When I'm lost in the mystery
To You my future is a memory
Cause You're already there
You're already there
Standing at the end of my life
Waiting on the other side
And You're already there
You're already there

From where You're standing
Lord, You see a grand design
That You imagined
When You breathed me into life
And all the chaos
Comes together in Your hands
Like a masterpiece
Of Your picture perfect plan

Father God, I'll put on a few more layers and a coat. I look forward to the flowers in Spring. In Jesus name, Amen.

Seeds of God's Word

In my hand, I cradled the tiny seeds I rubbed from the pods of this exotic looking plant through the latter half of my walk. I wanted to make sure I got every seed home safely so I could plant them around my home.

These were seeds of the Amaranthus Illumination, a gorgeous flower standing about 4 feet tall. The top of the plant has a poinsettia like flower with color ranging from golden yellow to deep red. And the folliage below, which is edible in salads I hear, is a deep green.

I saw this flower for the first time on one of my walks. A neighbor had two growing next to her mailbox. They are almost weird looking, poking out of the ground like they almost don't belong where they're planted. I'd never seen these before, but am enchanted. On another walk past the house, a woman was in the yard watering, so I called to her to ask her what they were. She told me the name and I repeated it over and over again to make sure I didn't forget the name so I could google it later. She explained how she found them on the internet, planted a few and now they were popping up all over her yard. Then she showed me the seed pods. "When they start to dry out, you come by here and take some of these pods and plant them in your yard." I was thrilled as I really wanted to see a few in my yard as well.

So after gently rubbing the seeds off one pod to bring back with me, I must've looked pretty silly with my fist closed around them, facing up as I carried them home. I carried them like I had a secret treasure. I honestly wanted to sprinkle them around the neighborhood as I walked so more could enjoy these gorgeous flowers. I can only hope next summer I will have those unusual tall blooms in my yard to delight in.

I wonder if I cradle the seeds of God's word as gently and carefully as I did those Amaranthus Illumination seeds. Do I treasure His Word. Do I desire to sprinkle it all over the place so more can enjoy in His love, guidance and forgiveness. And when I do sow the seeds of His Word, will I get to enjoy the end result - souls who come to know the Living Christ in all His Majesty?! Gosh, I hope so. I certainly try to.

Not knowing what the Amaranthus Illumination looks like when it first germinates, I sure hope I don't accidentally pull them out thinking they're weeds. Likewise, we need to patiently wait as God changes the hearts of men and women through His Sonlight and watering.

I think it's interesting the Amaranthus Illumination looks like the very flower people associate with Christmas, but with an added "on fire" look about it ... kinda like we Christians are all supposed to look. I hope to see them in my yard next summer as a reminder of what I hope to accomplish for Christ: a garden filled with folks on fire for Jesus.

Now That He Has Your Attention

Recently, presidential candidate Michele Bachman made a comment that got a few folks riled up. She indicated that God was using natural disasters to get the attention of the politicians and the American public. She said, "I don't know how much God has to do to get the attention of the politicians. We've had an earthquake; we've had a hurricane. He said, 'Are you going to start listening to me here?'"

She was later asked on CBS's Face The Nation if she believed God used the weather to get people's attention. She made a comment about not being ashamed to say she believed in God and then said she made the above comment as a "metaphor." Since a metaphor is a comparison, I'm not quite sure what exactly she was comparing. It seems her metaphor comment was a cop out.

I quite like the comment Bachman made about God trying to get our attention, because I have no doubt God sometimes uses natural disaster to send messages to us. He did it several times in the Bible. In Exodus, He sent plagues that included a hail storm. In Jonah, He sent a storm on the seas to get the prophet's attention, In 1 Kings, Elijah tells of a drought sent by God. In Matthew, an earthquake occurs when God in the flesh of His Son, Jesus Christ, is crucified on the cross. Of course we also have Scripture talking of Satan using nature at his disposal, too, as in the book of Job. So, who then, is responsible for an earthquake in Virginia, a hurricane up the East coast, a drought in Texas, flooding from a tropical storm in Pennsylvania, tornadoes in Alabama or Minnesota and devasting spring flooding in Minot, N.D?

Could just be that's the way the earth spins, as I hear many folks say. But it could also be our Father. Let's face it, America is not making all the best choices in the world. Culture is taking us in directions away from Scripture: fornication, adultery, murder in abortion and homosexuality to name a few, the last two supported by our own president. The Bible isn't vague on these subjects. It's quite clear. But some folks don't seem to care what the Bible says. Paul warned this would happen in 2 Timothy 4:3 where it says, "For the time will come when men will not put up with sound doctrine. Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear." We got a few folks with itchy ears these days.

Whether God used the weather to send a message or not, it's certainly driving people to their knees. I'm hopeful while praying, many are doing a self-examination, asking themselves if the life they are living is in accordance with what God demands of us. And if changes need to be made based on that examination, are we making them?

We need to direct our attention back to the Word to find out if we are in obedience to Him and turn our lives around to be in accordance with it, even if it's not politically correct.

My husband and I are currently facilitating a class called "The Truth Project" which focuses on Biblical truths in all areas of culture. When participating in this class you realize how many lies people today are believing. How Satan is twisting God's beautiful Word and tempting so many to fall for these lies. The American people are being duped and falling for it. If people realized they were being bamboozled by Satan, would they turn from these sins? In 2 Timothy 4:4 Paul says during this "itching ear" period, people will turn away from the truth and turn to myths. What is the truth? Well, according to Jesus Christ, He is. (John 14:6) And Christ, John 1:14 says, is the Word made flesh. Therefore, the Word is truth.

Isn't it about time we started obeying it?

If God is using natural disasters to get our attention, well, folks, I've had enough. And I certainly hope you have, too. He's certainly got my attention. Turn back to the Truth. Do we really what to chance it and see what else might be thrown our way?

Repent and Live

Ezekiel is one crazy book of the Bible. I've avoided it most of my life because of its bizarre imagery, most of which I never truly could understand. I mean he shaves his head and beard with a sword, lays on his side for 390 days, cooks food over excrement and sees wheels covered in eyeballs. Weird stuff. But I'm reading through the Bible chronologically this year, so I'm diving in headfirst with Ezekiel. And I've learned so much from it. Wish I'd have done this sooner.

Ezekiel prophesied at the tail end of the reign of Israel's kings (the Judah/Southern Kingdom). These kings were continuing the years and years of disobedience, breaking God's laws, worshipping idols and performing all kinds of heinous acts. The Lord sent messenger after messenger to warn His children to obey, but they refused. Repent and live, is His constant plea. He pursued them. They turned away.

I've come to the conclusion that Ezekiel is all about how God had had enough. He sends Ezekiel to his children in Jerusalem to tell them the jig is up. He's done and they are about to be conquered by the Babylonians. And He repeats over and over again, "Then you will know that I am the Sovereign Lord." Ez. 23:49b.

Of course Judah is conquered by the Babylonians, and the Israelites are in exile for 70 years. After that period of time, the Jews are never again in history accused of idolatry. They learned their lesson ... the hard way.

It made me think of God's children who are refusing Him today. The Ricky Gervaises and Richard Dawkins of the worlds. There will come a day when the Almighty has had enough. And woe to those, truly. What the Israelites received in the form of punishment from this holy, just, loving God - famine, plague, war, captivity, death - is nothing compared to what those who refuse His Son will reap in the end.

Ezekiel chapter 18 is all about how each soul is responsible for their own sin and their own repentence ... and ultimately their own eternity. And He promised in 16:63 that when He makes atonement for us in Christ Jesus, that we will be ashamed. God says to the Israelites in 22:14 "Will your courage endure or your hands be strong in the day I deal with you?" Woe to those who think that time will not come.

I prayed today for those who are so arrogant to proclaim there is no God. Psalm 14:1 says "A fool says in his heart, 'There is no God.'" I am praying these children will turn back to our Father who loves them so much and promises such an abundant life in Him. The message is clear. The message is love, mercy and grace. The requirement is repentance and obedience.

Christians, we need to be praying relentlessly for our lost brothers and sisters. We need to speak to them about Jesus, as Ez. 2:7 says, "whether they listen or fail to listen." When God says in Ez. 22:30 "I looked for a man among them who would build up the wall and stand before me in the gap on behalf of the land so I would not destroy it, but I found none," my heart sank a bit in me. How many of us do not stand in the gap? We live in a country so blessed by God, yet our culture is slipping into the same detestable practices as the Israelites. We need to be courageous, bold and persistant in Christ's commission to "Go therefore and make disciples of all nations" (Matt. 28:19).

Ezekiel 36 promises hope when we've repented: "I will give you a new heart and put a new Spirit in you" (verse 26); "I will save you from all your uncleanness" (verse 29); "You will be my people and I will be your God" (verse 28). What peace! What joy! Glory to Him!

For those reading this today who have turned away from the One who created and loves you, I share in Ezekiel's message ... repent and live.

No More Ice Cream Cones

I watched as the school buses went by today, picking up and dropping off kids. I saw the many Facebook status posts where youth and parents alike excitedly talked about their children's first day of school. And my heart hurt a little. Just a little.

I took my youngest, Anton, to college on Saturday, leaving our home an empty nest. I knew there would be adjustments. Funny ones like not having to buy Frank's Red Hot Buffalo sauce or jars of Alfredo sauce. Not having someone to collect garbage Monday nights or unload the dishwasher. Not ever having to hear SpongeBob on the TV. Or walking into Anton's room, seeing the mess, sighing and just walking back out. But I miss Anton's wit, laughter, smile and company. It's very quiet around here. So when the school buses went by, it was just a reminder of his absence. And with my daughter 19 hours away in Rhode Island, the space just feels emptier.

I had a conversation with God today telling Him how much I missed my kids. How I hoped Brad and I had done a good job raising them. How we hoped they would make good decisions on their own, make precious friends and serve His Kingdom in some special way. And I lamented about the whole separation thing in the first place, and how I can't wait to have them come home.

That's when the tears came. But not from what I was feeling about my kids, but rather the realization that God feels the same way! He sends His babies down to Earth for a time. He hopes we make good choices, obey His Word, surround ourselves with precious friends and serve His other children. And He misses us! Oh how he misses us! He longs for us to speak with him, as I long for texts, calls and emails. He longs for our visits in worship, like I long for Skype times. And He can't wait for us to come home. How devasted He must be for the ones who abandon Him ... no calls, no visits and no desire to come home. Oh, how His heart must ache for those. Made me want to reach out all the more to His children to be sure they knew about the Father who loves them so much.

On the first and last days of school, I always bought my children an ice cream cone. This is the first time in 15 years I won't be buying cones. I wonder if the day I enter Paradise, Jesus will meet me at the gate with an ice cream cone? While I hope it's chocolate, I'm really not sure I care ... I'll be home.

Gift of Grace

As the preacher spoke today at the funeral, I noticed the woman diagonally in front of me start to shake. I could tell she was sobbing, and she brought a tissue up to her eyes frequently to catch her falling tears. She wasn't related to the man who's funeral we attended. She was a waitress who frequently served him at Cracker Barrel.

I guessed this was who she was prior to introducing myself after the funeral service because she started crying when the pastor spoke about her specifically. See, today I attended the funeral of the care receiver my husband has visited through Stephen Ministry for more than a year. Ken passed away unexpectedly Tuesday from a heart attack. As Stephen Ministry is a confidential, precious, caring ministry, I knew next to nothing about Ken until these last few days. I learned Ken had multiple physical issues in addition to dealing with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Everytime Ken had a doctor's appointment, he later went to Cracker Barrel for his meal. Because of his OCD, it would take sometimes up to 3 hours for him to finish a meal. The pastor mentioned that Ken had a photographic memory, remembering detailed facts and dates. Ken even knew the Cracker Barrel waitresses' birthdates and their children's birthdates because he took the time to ask. My husband told me Ken particularly talked about one waitress named Patty. When noticing this woman sobbing in front of me, I deduced this must be Patty.

After the service I noticed her walking by herself, still weeping, heading to the mausoleum. I walked over to introduce myself and tell her how my husband had told me how much she'd meant to Ken. "You were truly a gift of grace from God for him," I told her. "Oh, no, he was a gift for me," she responded. Patty told me how Ken ate more than any man she'd ever seen before. She told me how she'd wait to put in his order for 28 minutes, because he always went to the bathroom after he ordered and it would take that long before he came back to his table. "I timed it perfectly so his food would come to the table when he returned." She told me how none of the other waitresses wanted to serve him because it was about table turnover and making more money. "But for me, it was never about the money. He was the kindest, most caring man. I'm going to miss him," she said before bringing that tissue back up to her eyes.

The pastor at the service mentioned that we move at mach speeds in today's society, but that maybe we all need to learn something from Ken. In his weakness, he exhibited the love of Christ, taking the time to get to know a waitress at Cracker Barrel, touching this woman's life in a powerful way.

By the way, Ken's birthday was Nov. 16, 1931. I remember this because the pastor made us repeat it several times, calling it "a historic day" ... because Ken was born.

Ken has entered into Paradise completely healed and undoubtedly rewarded by our Father for his caring spirit. I wonder if Ken had any idea when he took the time to speak to Patty, he'd be teaching those who would attend his funeral what the love of Christ looks like?

I'll be eating at Cracker Barrel soon, to visit Patty. Rest in peace, Ken. Rejoice abundantly as you dance in Heaven and know that your compassion in the midst of struggles will spread through the Kingdom, as we follow your example. I look forward to meeting you.

A Second Deeper Look

I know God has wanted me to write this for a week now, but it's embarassment that has kept me from it. Plus a little time to collect my thoughts. As soon as it happened, it was as if I could hear the Father say, "You need to write about this." See, a week ago today, my husband and I got to tour the birthplace and home of our nation's second president and signer of the Declaration of Independence, John Adams. I have been a fan of John Adams since reading quotes of his in a book titled "America's God and Country" by William J. Federer. Here was a man who loved his country, wife, family and God, and I was impressed. After reading more about him and watching the HBO special on him, I was excited about seeing places where he lived. The Adams' descendents saved everything, so they had many artifacts in those homes from the mold for musket balls that Abigail used when melting her pewterware into ammunition for the American militia to the chair where John Adams had his stroke while watching the 4th of July 50th anniversary parade before he died later that day. I loved this tour and learned so much.

But when we first got to the birthplace, getting off the trolley with about 25 other folks, I immediately noticed a very loud woman with her family. She annoyingly kept announcing everything. "Whoa, low doorway!" "Three steps down." "Narrow hall." When our group was split into two smaller groups, I volunteered Brad and I to go in the other group hoping she and her family would stay in the second. Instead, she and her husband and two children were assigned to ours. I could feel my shoulders droop knowing we'd hear everything announced on our way.

After going in our second room of John Adams' birthplace and listening to our tour guide speaking, I noticed the woman had something in her hand. I recognized it immediately and then put two-and-two together. That's where the shame came in. She was holding something for her husband as they made their way through the narrow doorway, his hand on her shoulder. She held a long, thin white cane with a red tip. This lady's husband was blind. She was describing everything to her husband and giving him advanced notice of when to step up or down or duck. I felt so badly about my initial thoughts. Here I was looking around in wonder at marvelous history, and he couldn't see a thing ... unless his wife told him about it. And she truly did an amazing job. Her comments throughout the rest of our tour were no longer annoying, but rather precious and uplifting. I was awed by her.

How quick I was to judge this loud woman, not realizing the selflessness she showed her husband. And all it took was a second, deeper look at the situation.

I would love to say that from now on I will take second deeper looks at everything before making a judgment about anything, but I know better, and know I'm sure to make this error again. I'm just hoping I'll be convicted about it beforehand.

My husband told me years ago when meeting someone to imagine life in their shoes. Sadly, for that moment, I'd forgotten his wisdom.

I am thankful for a patient God who forgives and teaches me in this manner. And grateful for the eyes and words of one to the benefit of another ... and its lesson at my expense to bring glory to the Father.